Posh 'cox'
I used to row for the civil service rowing club. We were shite, I was an important part of why we were shite but less so than the 17 stone whinging asthmatic in our crew, Why were we put in the boat?

Anyway, this one time we were easyed (sitting doing nothing) when one of the Oxbridge boat race crews went past. Their cox said "On the next stroke, I want you to lengthen out, harden up and spurt!"

Ok, I know what the cox actually meant but it didn't stop us or the boat race crew from falling into bits.

We used to have this really sexy cox called Kate. Every now and then while we were rowing (badly) she would say "Can I feel it? Yes, there! More strokes like that, yes, there, there, there, c'mon push through! Yes that's right, now I'm feeling it, can you hear the bubbles under your bow?"

Ok after that, I have to tell you that it is really fucking hard to row with a stiffy without causing permanent injury to oneself.

Espeically when you are rowing at stroke (right in front of the cox) and the splashing caused by your inept crewmates is causing her to look like something out of a wet t-shirt competition.

I have since asked her about this and she was fully aware of all of it. She figured that if she was going to be out on the river at stupid o'clock on a Sunday morning, we were going to suffer too. In interesting ways.
(Wascally Weasel now with 100% fewer jokes., Tue 7 Feb 2006, 23:07, Reply)