'Twas the night before Christmas
and most everyone
was sleeping, not trying
to think of a pun.

Their minds were at peace
and their souls unconflicted.
They needed no wordplay
on being addicted.

Their stockings well-hung
(in the G-rated sense)
while lonely apeloverage
was tired and tense

and...no, actually fuck it.
I'm not spending all night.
Merry Christmas to all
though this poem is shite.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Wed 24 Dec 2008, 14:46, 6 replies)

Thank you
For brightening up a rather dismal day at work.

And it's pretty good actually.
(Blue_in_Exile, Wed 24 Dec 2008, 14:54, closed)

Merry Christmas
Mr. Loverage.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Wed 24 Dec 2008, 16:14, closed)

apeloverage
There are three different popular methods of pronouncing this most enigmatic of words.

The first is that of pronuncing the name based upon its apparent component parts: Ape-Love-Rage. This is the most logical method, yet the least natural. This is known as the ALR form.

Then we move on to the method most natural for a speaker of standard English, this breaks the name down thusly: Ape-Lover-Age, with 'age' being pronounced with the venacular 'idj'. This form [ALA] is also a contender for the component parts of the name, however, as 'rage' is more often associated with apes, in terms of copious poop-flinging and other such factors, then the idea of an age (as in era) of human-ape carnal relations is far less likely.

The third method is that favoured mostly by the nouveaux riche, who believe everything must be pronounced in [an attempted and often incorrect] French manner to be considered of their standing. This form is broken down as such: Apelo-Verage [AV].

This presents us with three choices, the most common ALA, the hypothesised classical pronunciation ALR and the more modern AV.

This paper is not intended to sway opinion, but merely to suggest the three most popular historic forms of the most confounding of names, that of "apeloverage".

Whythankyou.
(Frozen_Banana Shaved against the grain; thoroughly unrewarding., Wed 24 Dec 2008, 16:32, closed)

I used to work in a parts warehouse...

and one of the cock-ups you could do was an 'overage' which meant 'giving more than what the customer had requested'

Although I wasn't aware of what an 'Apel' was, I have spent many months thinking that this gentleman was providing too much of it...thusly an 'Apel-overage'

and that's how I've always pronounced it.
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 24 Dec 2008, 18:44, closed)

I also considered this as a fourth option
but concluded that it was only a minor option as:
1. three is the magic number
2. what the fuck is an Apel?

Great minds, eh?
(Frozen_Banana Shaved against the grain; thoroughly unrewarding., Thu 25 Dec 2008, 0:33, closed)

This post wins.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Dec 2008, 21:26, closed)