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This is a question The Apocalypse

Power cuts, internet outages, mild inconvenience to your daily lives - how did you cope? Tell us your tales of pointless panic buying and hiding under the stairs.

thanks, ringofyre

(, Thu 14 Jun 2012, 14:15)
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A 151 word story about MAD apocalyptic fallout
Stockpiling

My ex would not wish the world to know that she likes to be read bedtime stories, or that she once released such a gargantuan turd that the toilet wouldn’t flush for a week. Likewise, there are dirty secrets that she knows about me that, God willing, will never see the light of day. People say that it’s romantic the way a couple can open up to one another, share their vulnerabilities. People are idiots. These things will out sooner or later if you’re living with a partner. Partners tell each other these things for the same reason countries have nuclear arsenals, but the partners bombs are “he makes a noise like a horse when he ejaculates”, or “she got so drunk she pooed herself”. There’s no intimacy in these shared truths, it’s a case of if I’m going down, you’re coming with me. Mutually assured destruction is not romantic.
(, Tue 19 Jun 2012, 16:10, 4 replies)
Fascinating I'm sure
But where's the relevance to the QOTW ?
(, Tue 19 Jun 2012, 22:10, closed)

The relevance, sir, is the stockpiling of the secrets to counter emotional blackmail so that when it goes nuclear, you scorch the earth of both sides. It's preparation for an apocalypse. Of sorts. It's utterly relevant. Mostly. Kind of. A bit. Stop looking at me like that.
(, Thu 21 Jun 2012, 11:48, closed)
“he makes a noise like a horse when he ejaculates”,
That's ok, if you are a horse. Nothing to hide.
(, Wed 20 Jun 2012, 3:07, closed)
If the toilet wouldn't flush
we can safely conclude that she shat in the cistern.
(, Wed 20 Jun 2012, 13:27, closed)

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