At the largest speech event in the state of Kansas...
I'm going to just admit it right here. I'm a speech nerd. I'm a policy debater in school, and have watched this stuff since I was five. So I've kind of had this ingrained into my mind and it's kind of screwed me up.

In January, our debate team was at the state competitions, and my coach needed an alternate for the alternate. Me being the daughter of the rather influentual school administrator that was going to be judging there any way, my coach asked me to come along.

First day is fine and dandy, with me just sitting in the back of the room drinking water and trying to read the judge's ballots. We're tied for first at the end of the night, so we go out for dinner at some fancy Italian place. I order some pasta dish, and it's okay. We get back to the hotel, have a pep talk, and we go to bed, for it is going to be a long Saturday.

All is well until around 5:45am, when I wake up feeling ill. A few minutes later, I'm running to the trash can in the room (which mind you, has no liner) and throwing up. I get dressed, and ready for the day. 6:45 comes along, and like clockwork, so does the vomit.

I'm certainly feeling off, so I decide to stay far away from my team and instead with said father. We stop at Mickey D's, and I order a large sprite, and some fruit. I'm slowly sipping along, and about another hour, in a black pinstriped suit, I am running toward the ladie's room. My vomit tasted sweet. There were chunks of strawberry in it.

Meanwhile, my coach sees that I'm sitting out for the rounds, and he is not too pleased with this. It takes him a while to figure out the intensity of my sickness.

This happens for a few more hours, until I'm exhausted, and people passing by stop to ask me how I'm doing, and make small talk. (I'm notorious on the circuit here because of my family's position in this sport (both brothers quite successful, and I would later be seen as a rising shining star in another speaking event) One of those people included a judge that was going in to the round. I think he voted for us out of pity, because here is a little novice being dragged out here, and sicker than a dog.

My father and I eventually were sent home, because I wasn't getting any better, and my coach was nice enough to realize that it was very possible that if I did not get better, I was going to have to go the ER because I was that dehydrated and couldn't keep anything down. I stopped vomiting after I got home.

It all seemed better until a few hours later, when I had the worst liquidy shits that to this day make me terrified to fart. Several ounces of Pepto-Bismol later, I feel okay, but exhausted.

Net gain: being probably the most respected novice on the squad, black shits for almost a week (due to the pepto), giving my family a really bad illness, and a shiny medal. Oh, and a taste aversion to flavored non-carbonated water because the taste reminds me of my sickly-sweet fruity vomit. I gag everytime I stupidly grab a bottle and nearly get sick all over again.

Except the kick in my figurative balls was that we only placed second in the state.

And it made me smile to find out my coach had the exact same sickness at the national tournament a few weeks ago.
(to the lighthouse, Fri 9 Jun 2006, 9:21, Reply)