I was the bane of babysitters....
...Fortunately, my parents didn't use them long. My older siblings got to be old enough to "look after me" fairly quick. By "look after me" I mean, my older brother would go see friends in the neighborhood, my older sister would stay on the phone the whole time, I'd make dinner for my sister and myself, and then clean the kitchen afterwards. If there was more time, I'd keep cleaning and do my sister's other chores for her, and she'd get back on the phone. When my folks would come home to a sparkling clean house, they'd pat my sister on the head "for being so responsible". After all, who would actually believe that an 8 year old would ever do any housecleaning?

Anyway, back to the topic. Babysitters.

I was a clever kid, and I disliked the thought of my folks not trusting me and my siblings enough to leave us alone. I figured, if they didn't trust us already, they should at least have a reason, so I terrorized any babysitter that entered the house.

My favorite occasion was with a girl who had a crippling fear of rats. I went to the local toy store and bought about one dozen giant rubber rats and hid them strategically around the house, hoping she'd find one. When it seemed she wouldn't on her own, I asked her for a bowl of cereal. I then heard the following:

"I don't know, Audienda, I think you're all out of Lucky Cha— GYAA!!! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!!"

She ran screaming from the kitchen and hid in a corner of the living room until I checked and made sure the "rat had gone away". Then I asked her if we could watch a movie. She pulled a VHS tape off the shelf only to find herself face to face with a rat the size of a guinea pig.

She never came back to our house after that, nor did any other babysitter. My parents found out what I'd done, but luckily for me they had a sense of humor!
(Audienda, Sat 30 Oct 2010, 15:45, 1 reply)

Me too
.
( bane, Sat 30 Oct 2010, 16:39, closed)