'Twas the summer of '79
Young Che was sitting his OWLs or 'O' Levels as we used to call them. Being a fairly strict old grammar school, we weren't allowed home to revise for the odd half day, but had to sit in silence at solitary exam-desks in the school hall and revise, while around us, some pupils took Latin or something. We sat (all 300-odd of us) alphabetically, and as luck would have it, my desk was in the row at the very back of the hall. It was warm, I was bored, I was 15 - soon to be 16.

Need I go on?

Well yes, because Erica Grimaldi was sitting just in front and one row to the right of me. I'd actually been 'in love' with her since primary school, though she barely knew I existed. Still, what harm eh? Everyone was concentrating on their revision and the very sight of Erica's bare leg showing below her skirt and the outline of her bra strap was more than enough to produce an erection of such severity that it threatened to part the fibres of my navy blue school trousers. It had already poked its head out of the top of my black cotton briefs.

Right, time to concentrate on Chemistry...

Fuck it. I ever-so-casually put my right hand into my trouser pocket. Little Che bobbed up like a friendly puppy to nuzzle my fingers. I stroked the back of his head, slowly, methodically, silently, stealthily. I stroked and stroked, this was nice, oh yes. There's Erica, so close I could almost smell the shampoo from her long, shiny hair. She shifted in her chair, her skirt slid a little further up her thigh, she scratched her leg, she pushed her hair back behind her ear.

On I stroked, methodically, slowly. My heart started to beat faster and faster, I had to control my breathing, I carefully stretched out my legs, oh yes, here it comes, keep going, breathe slowly, stroke, stroke, OH YES, that's it, that's it, that's IT. Heart beating, face red, breathe held I pumped spunk into my trousers. So much spunk. So hot, and damp.

And relax. Remove hand. Check the time - just ten minutes til lunchtime. OK, back to chemistry...

"OK, pens down, turn over your papers. If you're not taking an exam, quietly leave the hall."

I got up and followed Erica out of the hall towards the door. One of my classmates came up behind me,

"You dirty bastard Grimsdale!" he grinned at me, "I know what you were up to."

Shit! I slunk of to the toilets and cleaned myself up as best I could with a face as red as pillar box.

To my eternal gratitude, Alex didn't tell anyone what he'd witnessed. Disaster, but limited.

Still ranks in the top 5 of exquisite wanks of all time.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Wed 23 Feb 2011, 13:23, Reply)