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This is a question Bastard Colleagues

You've all known one. The brown-nosing fucker, the 'comedian', the drunk, the gossip and of course the weird one with no mates who goes bell ringing, looks like Mr Majika and sports a monk's haircut (and is a woman).

Tell us about yours...

Thanks to Deskbound for the idea

(, Thu 24 Jan 2008, 9:09)
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Donna the uber-bitch
I'm not going to mention the name of the company I work for, what with the damned confidentiality agreement and all that, however it doesn't mention bitching about dearly departed colleagues. Sorry, did I say dearly departed? I meant "Bloody glad to see the back of them" colleagues.

The one who takes the cake out of the various people I work with is a girl by the name of Donna G. A nasty piece of work if ever there was one. If you happened to have a Y chromosome and fell for her line of bullshit, she'd love you, and have you running round the office after her. If however you saw straight through her, or were worse, female, then your card was marked. She'd send snidey comments through the email, badmouth you to one of her minions, the usual kind of thing people like that do. She'd be very nice to your face though. However, it wasn't enough for our Donna to be just the office bitch. No, our Donna was a wannabe Wag. Apparently her boyfriend was in the Everton football team. I never did find out who he was, mainly because I didn't care. That didn't stop her talking about him all day long though. In fact, in the time I knew Donna there were several corkers I saw, heard about or were privy to.

My personal favourite was finding out that she was suing the Daily Mirror when they had printed something in the gossip pages saying she had slept with Jim Davidson. Naturally, everyone started taking the piss. Now, I wasn't exactly in the loop on this, and one night out she drunkenly stated that Jim Davidson had taught her all of her moves. When I asked her if she had slept with him, for the first time in several months, she blushed, went quiet and said nothing for the rest of the night. I got a few drinks bought for me because of that one.

But, moving onto Donna's demise. One day, I saw a manager I am on friendly terms with looking far more stressed than usual. Asking what was up, I was given the answer that she was dealing with a corporate espionage case. Corporate espionage? What?? I thought the world was going mad. Coincidentally, or so I thought at the time, Donna was out on her ear. Very quickly too. It didn't take too long for the rumours to fly around as to why she'd been fired, and it eventually transpired she'd been bad-mouthing the company to one of our competitors.

Later, we all found out she'd got a job working for an IT helpdesk down in Ipswich. She got fired on her first day when she turned up late, with a hangover. However, there was still more to come. One day, one of the ladies came in with a bloody huge grin on her face, clutching a women's magazine in her hand. On the front cover is our Donna. And what was she doing there? When I got to read the magazine, it turned out our dear old Donna had a rather interesting sideline. She was on the game.
(, Thu 24 Jan 2008, 21:35, 6 replies)
Haha
Google her name, comes up with that Jim Davidson thing you were talking about :D
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 2:15, closed)
Ipswich
Not the best place to have been on the game of late!
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 8:37, closed)
Heh.
Since this is now the primary site that comes up if you google the name, do you not think she is gonna know who you are?
Might want to edit a bit there.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 9:01, closed)
Je ne regrette rien :)
Besides, she was the one who sold her story to a magazine, and you can find info on the PCC website, it's a matter of public record! The woman truly was by her own petard hoisted.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 15:45, closed)
Donna
www.mytruestory.co.uk/page6.htm

Is this the one and the same? *wonders if Cosmo is the mag you're referring to or if you need to dash out to WHSmiths*
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 17:34, closed)
The very same!
It was some time ago though, alas. Perhaps you may be able to contact them for a back issue? If you're *really* that interested, that is.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 23:32, closed)

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