Midwives
being a new parent, you may appreciate my sharing (you may not too... anyway)

Midwives seem to come in two varieties, "lovely" and "twat". We had the balanced experience of both.

Our local MW who seen my wife through her pregnancy was great, unfortunately she retired not long after our daughter was born.

The MW running admissions at the hospital was a lazy shit. My wife had been in 'slow lablour' 15 hours and she tried to send us home (8 miles) because she was 25mm dilated, not the required 30, this measurement was taken with her fingertips btw, causing my wife to bleed substantially. I strongly believe that as her ward was completely empty at the time, we were inconveniencing her no-end to actually require admittance to the maternity ward while labouring.

The MW(s - long one!) who delivered our baby were fab, can't praise them enough. Afterward, my wife and daughter were moved from the delivery room to the ward proper. It was about 01:30 and I had to go home, leaving them alone when the uber-bitch struck.

The mouthy cow actually expected me to leave my wife and new baby without so much as saying goodnight. Upon my insistence, I was 'ordered' not to touch my child as "her head would be sore".
"No shit? I've just spent 35 hours watching her squeeze out of my wifes chuff! Sore? Really?"

If only I worked on the maternity unit. I would have a winning post, due to that utter, utter cnut!
(Greencloud Wanted to go fishing on, Mon 28 Jan 2008, 15:53, Reply)