The day I bought a carpet cleaner
The now ex wife had been on the drink with friends and she was always one who didn't know when to perhaps stop drinking and have some water.

So by the time she made it home & to bed she was totally out of it and collapsed on the bed and started snoring within seconds.

Already in bed myself I was slightly grateful for this and nobody wants a leary drunk walrus trying it on with you when you're sober.

I remember I was woken not long later by the hallmark mattress wobble as she began to clamber out of bed. I opened my eyes and was alarmed and helpless by what I witnessed.

She sat up, manouvred to the edge of the bed. Then sat on the mattress edge, which obviously felt reassuringly like a toilet seat and proceeded to pee what seemed like gallons of wee over her side of the bed and floor. She then, lay back down and went to sleep.

She refused to accept this could possibly have been her the next day despite being soaked in her own pee.

I'm glad she's gone.
(golddust QOTW now revolves around being a cunt, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:55, 1 reply)

She had a moustache?
Cool.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 13:30, closed)