Why Karma can suck my balls
A few years ago two friends and I were driving along a leafy lane somewhere near Swindon. We were thoroughly enjoying finding the only leafy lane near Swindon when we passed what looked like a thieving pikey bastard dragging two bikes along the road by himself (why would one person have two bikes if they weren't a thieving pikey bastard?). The bikes were steadfastly refusing to be kidnapped and kept getting tangled up, much to our amusement. Being keen supporters of intelligent social comment, Cheggers, our driver, slowed the car to allow me to open the window and yell, 'Stop knicking bikes you thieving pikey bastard' as he tripped over them once again.
At that moment, another youth (who later turned out to be an Uninsured Pikey Bastard) came out of a junction at a hell of a clip without looking, nevermind slowing, and ploughed into the side of our car, just around the front near side wheel, tearing it completely away. Both cars were a complete mess, and had we not slowed briefly to insult and laugh at Pikey #1, he would have come straight through the passenger door where I was sitting. The Police noted that his gearstick was stuck resolutely in 4th, and reckoned he was doing at least 60. It shits me up just thinking about it now.

So fuck you Karma, unless I picked up MRSA at the hospital later on.

So, always laugh at others' misfortune, always stop to insult a stranger, and don't go to Swindon. Or even near it. Ever.
(Hampton St.Roker (has probably had your mum), Fri 23 Apr 2010, 10:31, Reply)