Some non-entitiy you will have never heard of.
I ran a climbing wall a few years ago, had the usual wankers in who thought they knew how to climb, who would stand and criticise and maybe do a route or two. But, I was a rock bitch and I climbed to the best I could. I climbed at various places around Europe and taught so many people, that I do not remember most of them.

So, while I was running the wall I had an e-mail from a climbing legend offering his services to teach a select bunch a few tricks of the trade. We snapped him up and advertised the event, getting a full booking with in three hours or so. Places sold out and those who could not make it were suitably pissed off.

The day of the event came and I closed the wall to the plebs and shut them out, leaving just the select few, those with enough cash to waste that they could pay for tuition with Mr Rock God. They started to warm up, he was due any minute. They stretched and climbed the easy stuff, Mr Rock God was now late by ten minutes.

Twenty minutes later an obviously still drunk, slightly smelly man comes into the wall and asked me where the class was to take place. I pointed him in to the wall area and say laughing "Don't worry mate, the wanker is late anyway."

A sudden stony look and the drunk guy hits me with the attitude, the traffic was bad coming down from where ever he had been. Yes folks, the guy who was charging us several hundred pounds for what to be honest I could have taught for thirty quid was the drunken bum I had just insulted.

Our relationship did not really pick up after that and to be honest he was ok once he sobered up, although gobbing in my office bin to clear his throat was not appreciated. Climbers are a funny lot at the best of times, but the Stone Monkey is one of the funniest.
( Rev. Jayneflakes Buy my book, I need the cash for drugs and hookers, Wed 14 Oct 2009, 19:49, 2 replies)

I know who you mean
mr The Quarryman
(CheatingRabbit, Wed 14 Oct 2009, 21:22, closed)

So do I,
And he's truly a god amongst men. Scrap that he's a moody gifted bugger.
I saw him once at Hathersage as we were getting back into our car after a slap up brekky. Our stoned glares at this diminutive chap only materialised into gawping recognition after we'd locked glares for a good 10 seconds. By which time he'd got into his car. Well I blame it on the silly hat he was wearing, not the copious amounts of herb we were wont to consume.
I got chatted up by Arlie Anderson once too, but blew it. Damn

I miss those days. One day perhaps...when the kids grow up
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Thu 15 Oct 2009, 9:45, closed)