You would be on a register now...
but way back in the mid 80's when I was a teenager, a good few of my mates frequented a youth club run by the local Methodist church. As far as I can remember only one of them was even remotley Methodist, and the church didnt mind fairly well adjusted teenagers coming along to bolster numbers. I went along for the unihockey and indoor 5 aside, in a local sports centre paid for by the church.

There was no overt religeous overtones to the youth club except we were expected to, once in a while, help out with other church social events.

So I was gently press-ganged into attending a service, where fellow Methodists from some far flung place (Canada seems to ring a bell) were visiting and were performing in a choir for the locals. Me and my cohorts were to do the "whip round" at some predetermined moment and had been given the donation bags (some sort of velvet bag on a handle)

The signal was given and off we bimbled round the congregation, which was strangely receptive to me wandering round. I seemed to be the centre of some attention. Smiling old ladies, saying hello and stuffing the bag with a donation.

I walked back down towards the front, handed the offerings over and sat down. Oddly there was an peculiar feeling in my groin. An airy, sort of unfettered felling. Then the cold sweat of realisation hit me.

I had done all of this with my fly open and my undercarriage was more or less down. Not exactly out but was pretty much visible to see.

I still shudder over this memory even now.
( Fire & Forget it's the only way to be sure, Thu 1 Sep 2011, 23:05, Reply)