Famous for flailing
I flailed my legs around on local news. I was filming the pilot of a new political TV show just before the last election and ITV rocked up with a camera crew. I was under strict instructions not to move when any of the other cameras might have me in their shot so my legs had gone proper numb over the course of the six hour shoot. The one time all the other cameras were pointing the other way was the one time ITV's wasn't, so a two-second shot of me pedalling an invisible bike went out across east Anglia.

I tried to awkwardly chat up Elly from one-hit synthpop wonders La Roux. This was before she was famous, doing one of her first round of proper gigs at Chinnery's in Southend, where members of up-and-coming bands often come out after their sets to have a drink and hawk CDs. I'd been on the lash and she wasn't interested so when the conversation petered out I slunk back to my mates.

I've written adverts flogging timeshares on Nigerian television.

I bumped into Vic Reeves in a lift.
( Shegetz Chris Kamara's comedy moustache, Fri 21 Sep 2012, 8:22, Reply)