This one may haunt me forever.
I live in my house with two of my three grown kids and a friend of my son's who rents out a room from me.

My new wife and I went out of town for a bit over a week. Before I left I fed all of the animals, including the bird. I asked the kids to watch over the place while I was gone.

The night I got home I did a sweep through the house and all seemed pretty much normal. The bird made a quiet chirp as I went through the living room, and I made a mental note to check on her in the morning and pay her some attention.

The next morning I was just getting up when my daughter's voice came from downstairs. "Dad? Come down here. I think the bird's dead."

I raced down to find that the bird had in fact expired in the night. I also found that her food and water dishes were empty. She had died of starvation and thirst in the living room, with the kids right there.

I didn't yell at anyone or place blame. I did, however, weep a lot as I buried her in the back yard. And here comes the confession part- though I've never said anything about it, I could kick seven shades of hell out of the kids for not taking care of her. She was not part of the decor, she was a living being entrusted to my care, who I entrusted to the kids.

I still feel guilt and rage.
( Wanderer, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 20:28, 7 replies)

Why DIDN'T you yell at your kids? They should now how much they hurt you.

I'm sorry for your loss.
(Audienda, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 21:25, closed)

They knew.
They were there as I buried the bird. They saw my tears. They knew how much she meant to me.

A wise man once wrote:

After a bitter quarrel, some resentment must remain.
What can one do about it?
Therefore the sage keeps his half of the bargain
But does not exact his due.
A man of Virtue performs his part,
But a man without Virtue requires others to fulfill their obligations.

What could be gained from yelling at them? They knew what they had done. Haranguing them would not bring the bird back, it would only make feelings worse. What benefit would that bring?

The lesson was learned.
( Wanderer, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 22:24, closed)

Fair point.

What I plan to do, when the kids get older and have children of their own, is buy those grandkids every noise making thing I can lay my hands on. Whistles, drum kits...you name it.

Fucking kids...I'm playing the long game.
(XmanX captain upsetter hahahahaha, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 5:51, closed)

The bird was alive
when you got home.
(knackerz is skinning up, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 13:49, closed)

I don't think that mattered.
With respect to birds, I've only had experience of Budgies; but they're tough little sods (and I mean that with deep affection), they'll keep up appearances as long as possible because they're flock animals. Collapsing unconcious means certain death, by initial falling or ground predators - so their biology delays that by every means possible: stopping unessential processes; burning fat (what little they have, since they're from warm environments, kept in warm environments, and have to lift it all), then muscle tissue; all the time damaging internal organs.

So, by the time they clearly act ill, it's usually too late; serious and irreversible damage already done. Sure, if 'lucky', you can rush them to the vet, but their options for small animals are woefully limited - you can't hang an IV to rehydrate, perform dialysis, provide respiratory support, take blood samples; and unless exceptionally tame they'll fight any handling all the way, wasting more energy they can't spare.

In any case, most people's natural response to discovering such a situation would be to immediately provide unlimited food and water; which usually proves fatal. Few pet-owners could be hard-hearted enough (or possess the skills) to provide an appropriate and limited renourishment; such as an electrolyte solution needed to prevent hyponatremia.

My point is, after days of multi-faceted neglect; most likely the die* was cast. No matter what he did, a tragic end was inevitable.

Wanderer, you have my sympathy too. Perhaps one time I'll tell you all about the time I was outsmarted by one of our budgies; at least it wasn't while playing chess or something, so I don't feel too embarrased about it...

edit: * No pun intended, sorry.
(The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 14:52, closed)

you sir are correct,
in fact most parrots/parakeets do this so they as well as the above don't get shunned by the rest of the flock.

Me and the ex had a Lineolated parakeet which overdosed on sunflower seeds to his demise, looked fine until then.

Also had a budgie but the ferret killed that (I'd left by this point so nothing to do with me that one!)
(Kip, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 16:28, closed)

I am a lazy sod.
But even I make sure the animals are watered and fed and get some attention during the day.

I hope they learned from that and learned bloody good.
( vix0r was not Matthew on, Sat 28 Aug 2010, 1:07, closed)