Pay the Piper to Bugger Off
Back in 1998, I was living in London, and decided to take a short holiday in Scotland, for the first time in many years. I'm originally from Dunfermline, but left there at age 6, and had only been back a couple of times since. From Aberdeen I got the coach to Inverness, where I'd never been before. Talk about a tourist trap... it wasn't high season (May), but I only found a place to stay on the 3rd attempt:

1) Inverness centre: a small old hotel. I'm not used to hotel receptionists suggesting I check the room out first, but it was good thing she did. Grey walls, rickety beds, smelly drapes: I walked back out.

2) Inverness outskirts: found a business-type hotel on the outskirts. They had rooms, but frighteningly expensive, way over my budget.

3) OK, I was going to visit Elgin anyway, so I hopped on the bus. (Good thing I'd left plenty of time.) I found a place on the outskirts of Elgin, which wasn't too expensive. The room was small, the bed... basically a camp bed, with basic bedding. The other guests were mostly coach tours.
It would do, I'd had a long day... but it wasn't over yet. The disco right below my room was in full swing by 8PM, and went on till 1AM. Then the Piper started playing outside my window.

Just to put matters in to perspective: not only am I Scottish, I actually learned to play the bagpipes and joined a pipe band. I have nothing against them except their limitations as a musical instrument: they don't scare me. They are a proud part of my heritage, but I DO NOT WANT to hear them outside my bedroom window at 1AM. The piper was probably OK, but had clearly had a few too many drams, and should not have been operating heavy machinery in the middle of the night! It was probably a tourist anyway... the locals would have had more sense. I think.
( bnt what, me worry?, Fri 18 Jan 2008, 0:55, Reply)