The Kursk
The hotel looked fantastic as I approached it. The Leicestershire village was a real picture postcard place and as I drove into the area I passed along a daffodil-lined avenue with a large country park on my left, then over on my right a large stately home behind a moat dominated the scene. This was the place I was staying, and it looked fantastic.

I had stayed there a few times before and never really liked it. From the outside it looked stunning, but inside it was rather old-fashioned and in need of redecoration – the corridors were lined with flock wallpaper and the restaurant was a migraine-inducing mixture of seriously floral wallpaper with red gloss paint on all exposed woodwork. In addition, the building seemed to be built out of an old Faraday cage as no matter where you were you could not get a signal on your mobile phone and all of the corridors were very, very long, floored with some kind of weird springy boarding, and all of the doors opened in different directions. Truly, it was a strange place.

On this occasion I checked in and was handed my room key. I set off on my long walk to my room down endless creaky corridors and eventually found my door. Once inside I was overwhelmed by the strong smell of smoke in the room and, being a non-smoker, I phoned the reception to ask for a different room. However, there was no answer and so I had no choice but to walk back to the desk and speak to somebody in person. After an apology I was handed a different key and set off on my way to my new room which was somehow even further away than the first one.

I opened the door and instantly I felt cold. The room hadn’t been used for quite some time and there appeared to be dog hairs on the carpet. Unwilling to trudge all the way back to the reception I unpacked, then went into the bathroom to use the toilet, which was where I saw something I’ve never seen before. There, at the bottom of the toilet bowl, was a human poo, lying in the depths like the stranded Russian submarine the Kursk, much of its colour drained away and staining a large oval area of the toilet bowl like an evil halo. I confess that I screamed.

(See also this one by me)
(nasalhair The Twix guy!, Tue 22 Jan 2008, 12:13, 1 reply)

Bosworth Hall Hotel?
Yep, they are pikey as fuck there. I went to school in the village and know it well :(
( Maladicta, Tue 22 Jan 2008, 19:09, closed)