Crap meals outI'd chosen to take my in-laws to one of my favourite restaurants, only to discover it had changed hands the week before. We waited half an hour to get menus. The waitress broke the cork in the wine we ordered. She got our order wrong. The food was luke-warm, mine was overcooked, the rest was undercooked. After waiting another 40 minutes for the last course, we were told that we couldn't have any as the chef had "forgotten to de-frost the puddings".
Let's just say they didn't get a tip. Tell us of your crap meals out.
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chthonic, Thu 27 Apr 2006, 14:22)
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A Picnic at Terry Venable's HouseAround the time of El Tels falling out with Alan Sugar myself and Paul Merton were invited for a lovely candlelight supper (in the style of Hyacinth Bucket/Bouquet) round at cockney Terry's gaff. Me and Paul spent the journey there indulging in jolly banter. He'd come at me with "you think you're me", to which I'd respond "what an odd thing to say" and then we'd start laughing. Paul despises bad grammar and irrelevency. He's a bit of an old twat to be honest.
So we were doing our best Hyacinth Bucket impressions. I was screeching "Emmettttttt!!!" and "RRRRRRRichard" and he'd come back back with "Vicarrrrr". Great days. It was all spoiled however when we arrived at Terry's house to find him absolutely pissed. He spent the entire night ranting about Alan Sugar's beard "its a shit beard isn't it" he repeated endlessly.
It got worse when we discovered the meal he had prepared was a Penguin biscuit each and a glass of bleach.
Me and Paul made our excuses and left. I think my excuse was "my shin bone has become sarcastic". Paul was unhappy as he seemed to think he'd said this at some point before and I was plagiarising his work or some daft nonsense.
(, Fri 28 Apr 2006, 8:15, Reply)
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