A good mate of mine plays for a local rugby team

On said team is a chap called beast.

Unsurprisingly this is because he is fucking huge and accordingly has the biggest penis this side of a seriously aroused narwhale.

Confident in the extreme about his mighty apendage he would often saunter out of the shower doing "the helicopter".

As is traditional and in some parts of the country compulsery, my friend, beast and some other neer do wells where, to coin a phrase, out on the lash.

Good times were had by all and the inebriated posse stumbled home in good spirits.

Now this friend only has a small apartment and such there really wasn't room for everyone to sleep and as such my friend and Beast ended up sharing a bed. Nothing wrong with that, they were all friends, however Beast has a girlfriend and was used to having a bedtime companion.

As the banter of the evening died down our two bed buddies dropped off into booze induced catatonia. That was until my friend was woken by something disturbing.

Beast was spooning him and not only that he was "poking" him in the back. Confused by sleep and alcohol my friend tried to shuffle out of the way only for the still sleeping Beast to tighten his grip and increase the pressure in his dry rutting.

"Piss off" muttered by eloquent friend.

"Shhh" replied Beast stretching out a hairy paw and stroking my friends face, "just take it!"

Needless to say my friend was out of bed in a shot and spent the rest on the night on the cold, but rape free floor.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Nov 2008, 14:41, 1 reply)

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..."just take it" made me laugh outloud like a 5 year old girl.
(Mr.Dog was in love again on, Sun 30 Nov 2008, 20:15, closed)