I was going to keep this one to myself
*Warning, may contain nuts...

About five years ago, my then boyfriend and I took his father up on the lovely offer of a week on the canals, in the narrowboat that he lives on full time with his girlfriend. Now I should have heard warning bells ringing about four months before that, when the said father grabbed the arse belonging to his other son's girlfriend at a party. I ignored it because I was a grown up girl of 39, and she'd have been about 19 at the time, so I thought I was out of danger. Rather than her age and status marking him out as a total sleazebucket. Nope that didn't register. Despite even finding out that his own girlfriend was younger than me. Not even a blip..

Now, we were on a traditional built narrow boat, narrow being the operative word. So for a whole week, every time my boyfriend's Dad has occasion to pass by me on board (and believe me, I lost count of the times) he found that he had to press right up against me so that I could not only feel his paunch against my back, I was made aware of the contents of his packed lunch as well. Every time. Lots of times.. I'm cringing now and it was five years ago...

Mind you I had the last laugh, when the last evening of the week, he nearly blew the whole boat up in a filling lighter/gas cooker incident, that saw me running down the towpath with my handbag, and no backwards glance to see if he was ok...

Length? I got a good 50 metres away before I looked and made sure the boat was still there..
(Beer Elf Thought this was like a campfire, anyhow, on, Sun 30 Nov 2008, 19:27, Reply)