Cringe!Chickenlady winces, "I told a Hugh Grant/Divine Brown joke to my dad, pretending that Ms Brown was chewing gum so she'd be more American. Instead I just appeared to be still giving the blow-job. Even as I'm writing this I'm cringing inside."
Tell us your cringeworthy stories of embarrassment. Go on, you're amongst friends here...
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chthonic, Thu 27 Nov 2008, 18:58)
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I have a much missed friend who lacks the ability to cringe....to his benefit.
He regularly greets strangers as "doctor", "nurse", "cheeseman", "maverick", "douche" etc. This is often followed with, "What's the beef?".
At the age of 29 he has taken up rollerskating with charity shop wheels - no rollerblading, no tricks, just rollerskating through the park 80s style.
Once deliberately jumped off a 10 foot high stairwell in an effort to look cool. Broke his legs but all he'd say about it afterwards was that he was "back in training for the next jump".
Took stealing traffic signs at university to a new level by nicking all the roadworks paraphernalia in the area and stacking it up in a mate's room, after he'd broken in. Still laughs about it, and about how he'd exchange pleasantries with puzzled cops as he went around stealing.
Tried to pay for a 4* hotel room with a banana.
Used to blag his way into music venues by claiming he was writing for whatever local music publication (sometimes he had vague affiliations mostly through sending off strange emails to said publications). Everyone with him was a radio mole/photographer/general +1. He was very good at it. Half an hour into one night where the tickets would have cost £15 each he passed out cold, but still wrote a totally fictitious review in screwball nonsense style that Chris Morris would have blushed at.
Plays David Bowie songs on a battered charity shop-guitar covered in black paint and dayglow monsters.
He's now head of physics at a private school in Surrey and thinking of getting married. WTF?
(, Mon 1 Dec 2008, 22:18, 1 reply)
It makes sense about the "physics teacher" bitI think you have to be slightly mental to teach physics.
Two physics teachers at our school when I was a lad:
1. One of them wore a dickie bow all the time. Even away from school, whilst "off duty"
2. The other one had a big ginger beard, a ginger mullet, looked like Chewbacca and had painted his wheelie bin at home to look like the Milennium Falcon.
(, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 8:50, closed)
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