I am a very bad man
'Twas a dark and stormy night, clearing later, occaisional showers of fish and I was bored and slightly drunk. The rain had stopped about an hour ago but it was as dark as the soul of an advertising executive.

I knew that there was supposed to be a beach party that night, hardly anyone I knew but better than sitting in a creaking hut and waiting for nothing to happen. So I got up, grabbed my grandfather's old black sou'wester mac and hat and looking like a refugee from "I know what you did last summer", slipped out the door. I had to walk down past the old Priory, now a hotel and between the clouds and the trees it was blacker than Satan's ballsack. Up ahead was a line of tea candle lamps so I grabbed one and headed down to the beach.

A hundred yards ahead were 30 people round a small campfire tripping their little nuts off so I decided that a prank was in order. Swinging my lantern ahead of me, dragging one leg and moaning like an uncouth zombie I staggered towards the light.

They shat themselves, apparently if your tripping your gourd off a zombie/psycho/ancient mariner type is not who you want impinging on your conciousness. When the screaming died down I was soundly cursed for destroying their peace of mind, disturbing ley lines and generally being an arse. So I told them that I'd only come down to warn them about the poisonous, flesh burrowing sand hoppers and left them to to enjoy a night of tears and frantic scratching.
(Falco, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 1:07, 4 replies)

you have a sick sense of humour
i would have done the same thing! :D
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 1:19, closed)

Me too
Hurrah!
(mr-lizard Hell's teeth man!, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 1:24, closed)

That's very mean
but funny as fuck. *click*
(berk, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 10:20, closed)

LoL
Really. Like a mong.
(Donkey Hotay Tilting At Windmills Since, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 14:22, closed)