Sparkie in the big city.
Once, when I was a young Sparkie, I bought a house (with a mortgage) and set up home with my fiance on a traditional English red-brick Victorian terrace, in my home city.

I used to love the walk home in the summer, across the old railway sidings and down the side of the canal. However, as summer turned into autumn, it got dark earlier. It did this every year, I just forgot, being loved up and all. I hadn't brought any money with me that day, so I couldn't get a bus, even though I'd have liked to, as it was really beginning to get dark.

I turned off the main road, onto the disused sidings, and along the bushes, ignoring the rustling leaves, leaves rustled in the wind.

Ignoring the moving shadows in the bushes, shadows moved in the wind, so it was nothing.

Besides, as my Dad always used to tell an alien-fixated little Sparkie, "There's nothing here in the dark that wasn't here in the daylight, Sparkie" I muttered those same words to myself as I scurried forwards, hands in my pockets, ignoring the rustling, moving shadow behind the bushes, ignoring the grunting noise, and the young man with the huge naked erection that he was rubbing and grappling frantically with..
Only I couldn't ignore it, or the young man on the other end of it, as they both emerged from the bushes and stood on the path in front of me, blocking my way down the pavement.

He politely asked me (even said "Please!") to raise my skirt a little bit. But I couldn't reply, couldn't breathe or move, couldn't have been more disabled if he'd hit me over the head with his appendage, rather than (seemingly) attempt to strangle it, whilst whispering obscenities to me.

Finally my legs answered my brain's frantic communiques, turned my body around and propelled me back along the street, towards a car dealership, where I explained what had happened to me. The lovely staff called the police, and insisted on plying me with cups of sweet tea, and biscuits until the police came.

The young WPC taking my statement, after my only part-describing the young man, put her pen down and looked at me, took a deep breath and remarked "This is going to sound like a really strange question, but was the penis erm... exessively large?"

"To be honest officer, I haven't seen that many, but yes, huge, why?"

"Well, it sounds from your description like the same boy, and we've had about 120 reports of incidents like this over the past few months"

"Oh.." (Well, there's not a lot you can say to that..)

PS. six months later, a young man appeared in court charged with indecent exposure on six specimen charges, he asked for 500 other offences to be"Taken into consideration when sentencing" . And he was 17.
(Beer Elf Thought this was like a campfire, anyhow, on, Sun 26 Jul 2009, 18:42, 3 replies)

I suppose
the urge to wave it around must be quite strong if it's huge.

I feel I have somehow just made an unfortunate admission there.
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Sun 26 Jul 2009, 21:13, closed)

Yeah you did,
I was just going to ask if he was on here somewhere.
(Rsoles, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 17:26, closed)

Hmm
It wasn't so much that he waved it, it's just that he waved it so much, how do you find time for anything else?
(Beer Elf Thought this was like a campfire, anyhow, on, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 18:02, closed)