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Ever gone on a date when "she" turned out to be a male university lecturer in his 50s who tucked his shirt into his Y-fronts? No, me neither. Tell us how it all went shit-faced.
( , Thu 4 Sep 2014, 13:13)
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She was proper into dried fruit. Like a dried fruit maniac. She was mental for those mixed bags of nuts and dried apricots and all sorts.
Anyway, relevance is irrelevant at this point of the story. My missus had a cracking pair of knockers and I always thought that having one done and not the other kind of made her walk with a bit of a limp, so she was going to get the other one done, as we walked into the tattoo parlour she dropped her dried apricots and dates....shock fucking horror! I tripped over and fell straight onto the machine that puts holes in you, I tried to take control but it had a mind of it's own and I ended up piercing my own mouth.
( , Thu 4 Sep 2014, 21:16, 2 replies)
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( , Thu 4 Sep 2014, 21:30, closed)
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