Desperate TimesStranded in a hotel in an African war zone with no internet access for two weeks, I was forced to resort to desperate measures. Possessing only my passport and the clothes I stood up in; and the warning "You can catch it shaking hands with a vicar out there" ringing in my ears, I had to draw my own porn in order to preserve my sanity.
Alas, it all came out looking like Coronation Street's Audrey Roberts, but, as they say, any port in a storm.
What have you done in times of great desperation?
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 15 Nov 2007, 10:10)
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Another poo storyI wasn't going to post this again, as I've done so a couple of times in other QOTWs, but WTF. Here again is the story of my Lake Michigan dump:
I was on holiday in 2003 in the US, and was swimming in Lake Michigan when I urgently needed to drop one. Really urgently. (OK, maybe not quite Pooflake-urgently, but you get the idea).
I had three options:
1 - get out of the water and run the half mile or so to the toilet block
2 - make like a cat and dig a hole up in the sand dunes (the beach was pretty quiet!)
3 - drop my shorts in the water and let rip there and then
Needless to say, I chose option 3.
Interestingly, because of the buoyancy afforded by the water, the turd (which was impressively long!) didn't snap under its own weight as it would do under normal circumstances. Instead it emerged intact and tumbled slowly and gracefully to the lake floor in a manner akin to an astronaut aboard an orbiting spacecraft.
I had to make sure I didn't catch it in my shorts though!
Length - at least a foot.
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K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 21 Nov 2007, 15:31,
3 replies)
Outstanding!!Be greatful it was a sinker... I've done the same with a floater in a dead-calm sea, and starred in horror while Paddling away on my back, as it floated up into the wake infront of my chest...
There was no getting away from it... it surfed against me and stroked my nipples. =( truly Gnarly...
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Humpty Dumpty was Pushed Is unaware of having any limits., Wed 21 Nov 2007, 15:39,
closed)
Poo...lEew Humpty, that's gross. Crapping in water is not a good idea. Some manky bastard dropped one in a public pool and it kinda floated by him as he turned redder and redder. He had tried to get out, but a fatass was blocking the ladder. I was about to dive, but thankfully I saw it before I jumped.
(, Wed 21 Nov 2007, 16:43, closed)
There was a small currentSort of a longshore drift, on the lake that day. So the turd gently edged along the lakebed, away from me.
It was quite interesting to watch it. But I did make sure to walk a little bit up the beach before I went for a swim next time!
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K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 22 Nov 2007, 8:31,
closed)
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