Radiator and lettuce
Not me, but a story from my father, already immortalised for his obsessive lawn mowing.

Upon returning from an evenings drinking and feeling peckish, he and his friends decided to cook up some chips in Alec's kitchen. My father was despatched to steal some potatoes from my grandfathers garden and frying commenced.

In the absence of anything better to go with their chips, they decided to throw some lettuce into the fat. Lettuce is mainly water, and the chip pan duly erupted in a fountain of hot grease, covering the kitchen floor, walls, and ceiling. Someone then had the idea of tipping the pan of fat down the sink before it could do any more damage, where it promptly solidified, blocking the sink.

My father and his friends were thereafter banned from Alec's house by Alec's long-suffering wife. Alec and said wife divorced shortly afterwards. There's probably a moral in there somewhere.

Only vaguely linked to the topic but it amuses me and my length is beyond reproach.

EDIT: Forgot about the radiator in the excitement of posting the lettuce story.

In an unrelated incident, a friends car overheated on the way back from a day out (to Cheltenham, I believe). In the absence of water, lager was used to top up the radiator. Frothy, but effective.
(theweapon never ever bloody anything ever, Thu 15 Nov 2007, 22:04, 2 replies)

Erm...
And the radiator?
(ComplexStuff Was confused by life on, Thu 15 Nov 2007, 22:12, closed)

Yes!
Where's the radiator?

We want more radiator!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 15 Nov 2007, 22:40, closed)