I was never much one for the rough hurly burly world of DIY,
given that I'm a sensitive little flower, who would recoil at the horror of blemishing my velvety fingertips - I need them to write horrendously deep and meaningful prose. That's right reader, I'm you! I josh.

I do however like pretending at DIY, you know, when you hold tools and occasionally hit stuff, and to this end thought I'd make meself a shelf/clothes rack combo in my freshly painted room.

I'm gonna attempt to show you the basic premise:

shelf              shelf
 ----------]      [-----------
______|___|______

^ length of curtain rail wedged through curtain rail holders

I decided to eschew the measure twice, cut once rule, in favour of a more dynamic tilting of the head and frowning system, thus ensuring utter failure. Basically the two top shelves were not level. Somehow, and I still chuckle to think of the effort involved, I wedged the rail in there.

But it's in! Success. I adorn my creation with my clothes, and settle down to a well deserved jazz cigarette on my bed, possibly watching Gordon Ramsays Kitchen Nightmares, or some similar pillar of televisual entertainment. Minutes later, a soft "shiiiiissssssshhhhhhhh" noise is heard, followed swiftly by a "FWUMP". The FWUMP is made by all the clothes on the right side of the rail falling on my head - it is at such an angle, that any coathangers on it set off in a very slow, but very constant, slide. On the plus side, the left part of the rail is ridiculously effective.

Don't you just hate a long winded piece of guff with no pay-off? That statement works both for this piece, and when doing a poo.

[EDIT] Why can't html just be like, you know, I want a space there. Let me. Now. Oh you need a little 6 character doohickey to do something I can do with but one button push. Computers = WACKY AND FUN
(bacontrout got ska, Sat 5 Apr 2008, 21:30, 1 reply)

hahahahahahahahahaha
"in favour of a more dynamic tilting of the head and frowning system"
*clicks*
( seeballs Doo da da doo da da doo da da doo, da da doo da do, Sat 5 Apr 2008, 22:04, closed)