DIY disastersI just can't do power tools. They always fly out of control and end up embedded somewhere they shouldn't. I've no idea how I've still got all the appendages I was born with.
Add to that the fact that nothing ends up square, able to support weight or free of sticking-out sharp bits and you can see why I try to avoid DIY.
Tell us of your own DIY disasters.
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chthonic, Thu 3 Apr 2008, 17:19)
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like father, like son.my dad was a notoriously intolerant diy'er. woodwork was usually ok- thought things that didn't need to adhere to a certain size tended to end up at least 25% bigger than was strictly necessary. however cars were his weak point.
you could always tell when my pop was going to pop, you'd hear the immortal lines- a slightly quizzical yet exasperated 'what the fuck's going on with.. ' followed shortly by an almighty 'BASTARD FUCKING THING!!!!!!' usually followed by the crash of something being thrown in the air.
one time, after trying to do something arcane with the carburettor in our nice newish volvo, i heard the fateful words, looked round to see him storming away form the car, and hurling a rather large wrench into the air like a man posessed. up, up it went, reached the apex, twinkled defiantly in the sunlight, and l;ike a star falling to earth, plummeted down, and rather dramatically smashed the front windscreen, and made a chuffin great hole in the dashboard.
FAIL.
the look of total despair on his face is something i remember when he moans at me for overcooking the roast potatoes on christmas.
fast forward to the present day. pete's trying to refit a door onto what's a rather shabbily installed louvre type cabinet round a hot water tank, after the original door de-hinged due to a sex-related incident. one of the screws appear to have been gnawed by some wee beastie and has no head to work with. it's got to come out, or the door won't go back on and the landlord will shit (he's due home that afternoon) after trying to unscrew it with molegrips, i finally decide that being a small screw in soft wood, i could simply pull it out.
so i get my trusty clawhammer, and try to remove it as i would a nail.
as the entire cabinet comes off the wall, in falling separates into two louvred sides, and one pile of slats and splintered frame, 2 large chunks of plasterboard rip off the wall, and the whole lot crashes onto me, making me fall backwards breaking the slats on my futon, i hear the immortal words 'BASTARD...FUCKING... THING!!!' burst from my lips, and suddenly, i'm standing on our drive again watching a wrench spin silently throgh the air...
(, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 12:35, Reply)
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