I was good friends with a chap called Nigel in the late eighties.
He had a bit of a lisp, which got him some stick at school. He got over this, and to help him build confidence, he started singing with a band, and they did alright in the end, charting a few times I think.

Early in the band's career, they were doing a local tour in the South East, through Basildon, Chelmsford, Southend, among others. I was fortunate enough to roadie for them.

After the gigs (which generally didn't pull in many punters) they'd supplement their income by turning a few houses over on their way out of town. Nigel would hold the ladder, while Matthew climbed up, prised open the windows and climb in. Andy would hand the stuff down and I'd put it in the back of the van.

One evening, while this was going on, Nigel turned to me and said "Tho, thaber-tooth monkey, how doeth it feel helping Dodgy 'work' Etthex?". Felt pretty good when I'd got my 10% cut.

Later on, we did a bunch of other stuff, which, while fun, was entirely made up.
(sabre-tooth monkey, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:07, 17 replies)

B+ for effort.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:09, closed)

I will take your sympathy

(sabre-tooth monkey, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:48, closed)

Sympathy
Was it?
(Nigella Pussycat picking baked-in hair from creme brulee, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 22:49, closed)

You are being generous Doc.

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:11, closed)

It's Friday.
I'm in a generous mood.

Who fancies a fuck?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:17, closed)

No fat chicks.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:17, closed)

What about WW?

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:29, closed)

My penis isn't as large as Badger's head.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:37, closed)

Yes he does like her rather.

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:38, closed)

Her rather what?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 14:06, closed)

I stopped reading at 'lisp'

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:26, closed)

I stopped at "I"

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:28, closed)

You think you've got problems?
I had to read all of it.
(sabre-tooth monkey, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:49, closed)

Arf

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 13:49, closed)

I bet you were all
Making plans for him.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:39, closed)

Well, I only wanted what was best for him.

(sabre-tooth monkey, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 12:49, closed)

He has a future in British Steal

(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Fri 8 Jul 2011, 13:36, closed)