My lovely ma
hasnt remembered my birthday now for 11 years in a row. I even send her emails and texts to remind her (no phone calls mind..bit awkward) so this year I decided to make things easier for her and go away for my birthday but take her for a drink in my local the night before I go. When I first arrive at her flat she asks me why i'm there so I lightly remind her and she comes back with "Yes I fucking know!" ...clearly not.

So anyways she's already had a bottle of rose to herself and then downs two bacardi and diets in the pub next to her house. When we finally arrive at my local we are greeted by a large group of my friends who have decided to join us...who are greeted with my mum hanging off my arm telling them this:

"When Lil was born I thought she was a boy...the doctors said "heres your daughter!" and I was like "Fuck off! Look at its bollocks" ..."No Miss..definatly a girl.." "No! Its a boy! Massive balls!"

I love her dearly but my friends still have sneaky glances when I'm wearing my skinnies.
(Document Pocket, Fri 25 Feb 2011, 14:27, Reply)