You might want to bloat it out a bit more so it pushes everyone else's posts off the screen, for instance:
My old man
was an alcoholic (RIP DAD).

Every day after working down the pit he'd come home.

He'd get drunk on stout.

Then beat my Mum with a belt made from the skin of his own 15 children.

I was the biggest and strongest child and one day I decided that enough was enough.

So I threw all the bottles of stout down the stairs into the cellar.

And waited for Dad to return home.

Little did I know Dad had been to the pub!

I waited a long time.

When he got back he was wasted on massive amounts of booze.

He could drink like 80 bottles of whisky in one normal night.

And this time he'd really pushed the boat out.

(He was a big man my Dad).

We had a fight and I ended up pushing him into the cellar.

He was pissed and tumbled down the stairs.

Where a massive shard of glass pierced his skull.

And killed him.

I represented myself at court and got off with a fine.

Because everyone in the area knew what he was like.

And I'd done society a favour.

And then I was a hero.

And then everyone at school was scared of me.

And I didn't get bullied anymore.

And needless to say I got the last laugh.

cheers
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 27 Feb 2011, 21:04, Reply)