I'm pretty much a Fall completist and have never been single for more than a few weeks since the mid 1980s.
I suspect the reason you're still single in your mid forties is because you're shit and ugly. No offence like.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 5 Jan 2013, 20:56, 2 replies)

Well hello again
my fellow Doctor. And fellow Fall fan!

What's your favourite album? Mine's Bend Sinister.

Have you ever met Mark E. Smith? I have - but that's a story for a future "famous people I have met" QOTW.

Actually I've been to so many Fall gigs I probably know you...
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Sat 5 Jan 2013, 21:07, closed)

He once told me to fuck off. I think that's basically the same thing.
I'm the big bloke with the beard who once nearly squashed Frank Skinner's girlfriend during an over-exuberant Hit The North. Charmed to meet you.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 6 Jan 2013, 9:23, closed)

MES telling you to fuck off
is probably a sign of affection!

Mine's a pint should we ever meet at a Fall gig.

[Cue cries of hey funboys get a room etc]
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Sun 6 Jan 2013, 19:39, closed)

Impressive, but I have once did MASSIVE DRUGS off Mark E Smith's tits.
So, nyer.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 6 Jan 2013, 10:18, closed)

Bless
but MES is so thin he hasn't got any tits. Perhaps you've got him confused with Cyril Smith?
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Sun 6 Jan 2013, 19:39, closed)

Oh, shit, I've been caught out telling porkies on the internet.
I'm off to kill myself, now (and not for the first time).
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 6 Jan 2013, 21:06, closed)