The third Mrs B left me becuase my demands where too much for her.
When reporting to the third Mrs B that I had completed some small, mundane houshold chore ( taking out the rubbish, putting fresh water in the dog's bowl and so on ), I insisted on the following ritual-

I stand stiffly to attention humming a martial-type air, whilst the third Mrs B mimes taking a medal off a tray and pinning it on my chest.

She then engages me in awkward conversation for a minute or so ( asking if I have come far, what I do for a living, are my family with me etc ) before moving off.
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Wed 9 Jan 2013, 22:55, 2 replies)

I like this.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 9 Jan 2013, 22:57, closed)

So often is "autistic" thrown around as an insult on here,
it's quite a surprise to see it for real
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Jan 2013, 9:07, closed)