Father.
To understand Father I need you to bring two people to mind.
First the Major from Fawlty Towers. Secondly the man from the ads for Glastonbury on the BBC, the one who talks about a woman walking down the road with no top on.
Well Father has the personality of the Major but the accent of the man from the Glasto ads.

Also he is as daft as they come.

He will walk do the pub in the next village with myself, Mr Bin and Mother. Nothing odd there, he would make us be a brass band on the way.

He is not short of a couple of quid so bought himself a shiny new red sports car, built a garage for it to go in, but he wont drive it anywhere because then he would have to wash it again.

On a sunny day he will sit at the top of the garden and will listen for the church bells to ring 6 so he can have a beer. (won't drink before 6)

But the best thing is his comedy racism (please look away if offended by such things).
When "Fresh Prince of Bell Air" was first on the TV he walked in, looked at it for 5 minutes and said, "Bloody Hell, those n*ggers are so rich they've got their own n*gger.
To my very left wing uncle (who he loves wind up), "I've got nothing against n*ggers, everyone should have one, bloody hard workers".

I love my Dad
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 3 Nov 2008, 18:04, 4 replies)

that Fresh Prince comment
made me put Dr Pepper on me keyboard. Thanks for that :D
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Mon 3 Nov 2008, 18:27, closed)

Pronunciation
How on earth did he pronounce those asterisks?
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Mon 3 Nov 2008, 18:40, closed)

i know what you mean
heroes is always slightly better when my dad comes in and starts speaking in a japanese accent every time hiro is on.
(Sebastiano, Mon 3 Nov 2008, 20:27, closed)

Sounds like a jolly good chap

(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Tue 4 Nov 2008, 17:28, closed)