Yet Another Banjo Story
About a year back, I was in bed with my (now-ex) girlfriend and she decided to give me a happy little wake-up tug - except she takes it into her head that it would be really erotic to jump STRAIGHT and so about 30 seconds or so in, she takes a HUGE yank, I kid you not, as hard and fast as she could, in the deeply mistaken belief that I would be turned on by her eagerness and this would send me from sleepy to randy in 3.4 seconds.

Like a polite idiot I took a few more seconds of this before having to break off and dash to the bog before any permenant damage was done. It was a bit sore, but as that little visit was the start of my sexual career I was well chuffed to have a 'tale to tell the lads', even if it did hurt like a bastard. As for her? She turned out to be bloody mental, and it wouldn't surprise me if the Devil's Drawback was on purpose.

Cow.

Edit: My mate once broke his leg in two places after a harsh tackle playing football and spent 8 months in a full leg cast. It would have been less, had he not gone rolling on the floor flapping it about because it "didn't look dramatic enough". We knew that's what he'd done before he even admitted it, because there was a good 2-second pause between the time he initially hit the ground and stopped and the time when he started rolling about.

Twunt.
( Shegetz Chris Kamara's comedy moustache, Fri 3 Sep 2004, 1:58, Reply)