while earning some cash to study at university...
Apologies for this relatively unfunny anecdote in comparison to others

I worked for a building company just down the road in the small village I lived in. Having grown up doing physical things on my farm it wasn't too strenuous and I enjoyed it. Having been subjected to various horror stories about work related accidents by my work-mates I took it upon myself to be a bit cautious. Scaffolding poles and similar obstacles were skillfully negotiated for at least six months (one story had been how a water fight had ensued between two of the guys, and one had dashed forward ontop of the scaffold to throw a bucket of water at a rapidly disappearing colleague who had drenched him, when the board beneath him had slipped and he had plummeted to the ground via several horizontal poles including one between the nether regions. One young lad had also had his tongue stuck to a frozen pole as he wasnt the brightest of lads)

Anyway, needless to say my accident occurs when it was just me and one other bloke on a new job with no real hazards accept the foundations which had just filled with concrete, but had left two foot of a hole in which to start the first course of bricks below the ground. Having identified the trench as my major threat I felt relatively safe.
My first mistake.

My second mistake was loading the cement mixer with a full load and turning my back on it.

My third mistake was having set the mixer up on unlevel ground with a bit of brick beneath one leg to level it out.

The fourth mistake was setting the wheelbarrow up with the handles behind me.

I saw all this happen in slow motion - the mixer, vibrating itself off the brick topples forward and shed its load out of the front and 50KG of mortar spills into the waiting wheel barrow.The load of mortar, landing unevenly in the wheelbarrow tips it over and the handles entwine my legs pushing me towards the partially filled in trench. Precariously balancing over the trench at an angle of perhaps 45 degrees I see the mixer continue in its plummet forward into the trench, knocking the wheelbarrow, 50 KG of mortar and me into the trench.

My workmate (the bastard) is pissing himself with laughter. Suddenly he darts forward and is desperately dialing for an ambulance having seen the way my legs were bent awkwardly and fearing I may actually have injured myself comes to my rescue. Therefore i astound him by standing up, having miraculously escaped death and severe injury with only two sprained wrists and severe brusing. Plus a huge damp patch on my jeans where the mortar had hit me in the crotch making me look like I had pissed myself.
(monkeyseemonkeydo, Sun 5 Sep 2004, 15:59, Reply)