Pranks on my kids, Part 4.
'Twas the night before Christmas
and all through the house
was the laughter of the father-
because he's a louse!

When my sons were about four and five years old, they still believed in Santa, so I would sometimes do fake phonecalls with the cordless phone to Santa, telling him to skip our house that year because they were refusing to go to bed or otherwise misbehaving. Since I had gone to forestry school in the northern Adirondacks and they had seen pictures of me in the snow there, they didn't question too closely that I was on personal terms with Santa- after all, that's pretty far north in their minds. The call that had the biggest impact on them was the one I made where Santa told me that he was going to be going to the reindeer stalls to fill up their stockings that year.

So what did I do? I went out and got a box of chocolate covered raisins and poured them into the stockings.

The following morning they come downstairs and grab their stocking and start taking things out when the older one stops and says, "Hey, what's this?... EEEEWWWWW! Reindeer poop!"

Some chaos ensued.

Best part? As I was getting coffee he comes running into the kitchen in a panic because his brother's eating the reindeer poop.

The next Christmas when they found their own underwear in the tops of their stockings they knew who to blame...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 17 Dec 2007, 16:56, 6 replies)

That one works on our kids too
As well as the "every time you're naughty, Santa brings you one less present" line.

Parents are just evil in general, really.
( reallywittyname veraciously conspues lexiphanicism on, Mon 17 Dec 2007, 17:04, closed)

Whaddaya mean, 'Still' believed in Santa???

You don't mean.....?

You mean he does'n....?


WAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!


Aw Loon, you could've broken it to me a bit gentler than that!

*Rips up this year's letter to Santa*

*Quaffs mince pie, glass of milk and carrot for Rudolph by mantlepiece*

*Starts drinking heavily*
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Mon 17 Dec 2007, 17:09, closed)

TRL
I like it - a parent after my own heart!

*click*
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Mon 17 Dec 2007, 17:11, closed)

Actually
when my daughter was about 10 or so I said something about Santa not being real, only to have her burst into tears. I felt like an absolute asshole, but jeez! She's smarter than that!

(I do still feel pretty badly about that, though.)
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 17 Dec 2007, 17:24, closed)

"Some chaos ensued"
Haha, what a great line =)
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Mon 17 Dec 2007, 19:11, closed)

Evil Genius
Sooo evil but i like it!
What a great idea!
(snugglesacks, Mon 17 Dec 2007, 19:50, closed)