FailedOn my third driving test, I turned right out of the test centre, reached a pedestrian crossing, attempted to run over a little old lady, was prevented from doing so by the examiner grabbing the wheel, then proceeded straight back to the test centre.
The drive home was very, very quiet. I've never felt such a complete failure.
What have you failed at?
(
chthonic, Fri 5 Jan 2007, 10:21)
« Go Back
Foreign language shenanigansCape Town, 1987. My dad landed a job out there designing bits of an oil platform and naturally myself and my mother flew out to join him. I was quickly enrolled at a local school. Anyway, I was issued a form exempting me from having to study Afrikaans, much to my relief.
Anyway, bored of sitting in class reading a magazine for the millionth time, I join in with the recital of the alphabet in Afrikaans (note, yes it is different to English) and feeling full of pride, I attept a particularly harsh and guttoral sentence in front of the class at the prompting of a classmate called Lionel in my class who'd earlier translated a particular Afrikaans limeric for me about giving up masturbation (you can probably see where this is going, can't you?).
Thankfully my teacher, Mrs Van Rijswik was sympathetic to my plight, so I was saved the indignity of having to explain to the head of year why I'd just addressed the room thus (paraphrased):
"Between my legs I have a big cock"
I still blush at the shame.
(, Sun 7 Jan 2007, 11:33, Reply)
« Go Back