Okay...
I have always had a propensity toward impostordom. If I was around in the Victorian Era I would've been one of those guys claiming to be obscure royalty and reaping the benefits. Instead, I make up complex personas online and use them to trick people. Often, I think that I am doing something good for the world, even if my tactics are pure evil, such as the time I posed as a North Korean girl on MySpace and was contacted by an American who seemed to work for the army who offered to sell me state secrets.

Anyway, I've had one brewing for a few months that you'll enjoy. I've been taking it very slowly so they'll get used to me before figuring out I'm a total fraud.

Quite a few months ago, a bunch of us found this particularly dumb website for white supremacists somewhere in the US (I'm going to be fuzzy on details for now). These were particularly dumb white supremacists, the kind that wouldn't be welcomed on normal WP sites.

A whole bunch of us registered at once, with the intent to bring the group IQ down a few more notches, basically making a mess of the board.

My masterplan was to do some image-swapping. I stole some of their smileys and rehosted them on my own site, and got all the invaders to use one in every post. The intention was later to replace the image files with a collage of interracial pornography, thus glutting the board with the stuff. Unfortunately, the admins registered on our own site and saw us discussing the plan, and we were all banned and the images were removed.

And I had a lovely image picked out. It was something like 3000 pixels wide so it would mess with their browsers, and they'd have to scroll right to erase it. Plus, I copy-and-pasted their own edit and delete buttons in, so they would likely click on the wrong button several times. Plus, as they scrolled right, I had planted images in the upper right corner, so they would unwittingly scroll over to it. Basically, I made a pattern from three pornographic images, each one featuring a white woman being double-penetrated by two black gentlemen, with the speech bubble saying "I changed my mind! White power!" It really was an ergonomic masterpiece.

Well, I did get it into their site, where it still remains, thanks to one idiot (actually a British bonehead if I remember correctly) whose password was just his username. Ask me in comments and I will point you to where you can see my artwork.

Well, our main invasion was complete, but I had a sleeper agent in there. I'd registered one more "legitimate" user in an attempt to worm my way deeper. I was a 19-year-old single mother of three children who was very interested in white nationalism. Rather than try to sound like an idiot, I tried to be the voice of reason. In one thread about some kids carving a swastika on the door of a synagogue, I wrote:

"Agree or disagree with the message, dumb kids who go around defacing property in an attempt to spread are message are just making us all look like troubled preteens."

Good advice that the white power movement could stand to listen to (if only I weren't a...well, see my username).

They actually did agree with my point of view that time, but it didn't take long before everyone was suspecting me of being some kind of lefty. I got major shit in one thread about a neo-Nazi getting out of jail. The guy had stabbed two black guys in a Denny's, simply because they were with white girls.

"Congratulations, boys, you defended Denny's from a couple black guys. Was it worth the prison time?"

They didn't like that so much.

Meanwhile, a friend of mine got an account verified on there (let's call him Rob because that's part of the username), and I came up with an insidious plan. I posted a personal ad looking for a date on the site, and he replied. We later made a few mentions to meeting up and being in a relationship.

Unfortunately, I was banned from the site for a reason that still makes me actually fume (after all the other stupidity I'd read on there). A few senior members had mentioned they had Native American roots in their ancestry, so I started a thread mentioning I too was something like 1/16 Native, and it was good that people like us were involved in racial supremacy. And then the admin banned me, as well as the other impure members. I hope those other ones who were banned saw what a bunch of crap this was and changed their ways.

Well, there was a problem with the site and it was down for a month, and when the dust settled, the memberslist had been wiped out and a lot of the old posts were gone.

So, I signed up again under a similar username and said my fictional boyfriend Rob had disappeared, and asked him to contact me, because I had something important to say. My friend hasn't been online in months, so I also created a new account under his own name.

Because this QOTW will close soon, I decided to speed up the end game. Last night, under my Rob account, I posted:
"Ya dam right, I had to find out the girl Id been shtupping had mud in her vains on the internet! Do me a favor and keep your mixed genes the hell away from me."

Just a few moments ago, I logged in as my female character, and dropped this bombshell:
"FINE. Then I guess it doesnt matter to you that im PREGNANT and its too late for an ABORTION."

Anyway, I have only one move left until I reach the endgame I'd been planning on since we started "dating." I'll leave it to your imagination how I can blow this little racist soap opera up even further between Rob and his pregnant mud blood ex-girlfriend. Sorry for length, but after giving birth three times and expecting the fourth soon, I don't feel much down there.
(racetraitor has an alibi for, Thu 17 Jul 2008, 4:34, 5 replies)

I'm not sure that a white supremacist would say
schtupping...
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Thu 17 Jul 2008, 7:38, closed)

Nope, doesn't bother them
It doesn't matter what you say, only who you are. Just posted by the site admin:

"Well, if you were one of the "Native American" members here (which I think you just admitted), then I have to say, the decision was made that you were no longer welcome on the forum.

Please take/settle this drama elsewhere. Thank you."

These people make scum look bad.
(racetraitor has an alibi for, Thu 17 Jul 2008, 8:23, closed)

What if
everyone else on the board is a faker too?
( BadBadman saw an incorrect comma placement on, Thu 17 Jul 2008, 10:20, closed)

*clicks*
I would do something like this, if I wasn't so lazy and liable to lose interest after a couple of days =)
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Thu 17 Jul 2008, 11:36, closed)

URL?
Whats the URL for this forum?

Maybe we could do a mass-b3ta posting on it..

although browsing a site liek that in work when I work in south east London probably ain't a good idea.
(scotsbloke, Thu 17 Jul 2008, 12:17, closed)