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This is a question Family Feuds

Pooster tells us that a relative was once sent to the shops to buy an onion, while the rest of the family went on a daytrip while he was gone. Meanwhile, whole sections of our extended kin still haven't got over a wedding brawl fifteen years ago – tell us about families at war.

(, Thu 12 Nov 2009, 12:24)
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Have a pearoast while I contemplate posting my own family tale
This tale involves myself being drunk, and my mate Chris - the target of my merrymaking.

There we were, blokes drinking heavily, sat smoking around the table (as you could in them days) and having much fun. One of my chums goes off for a wee. Jumping at the chance to add extra comical value to the evening I took advantage of his absense by grabbing his phone and texting his dad. It was nothing nasty, just something along the lines of 'I LOVE YOU DAD, MISS YOU LOTS xoxox'

HO HO HO!!! How we laughed. Chris (for that is his name) didn't laugh that much. It turns out (and this is why such pranks can go badly wrong) that he hadn't spoken to or seen his dad for about 4 years following a rather spectacular falling out. Needless to say I felt like a bit of twat, apologised and bought him a pint. He explained what happened (I won't bore you with that bit) and then his phone beepety beeped.

It was his dad.


Chris was a bit stunned and went very quiet and disappeared off the toilet, returning a bit red-eyed.

He had spoken to his dad (in a drunken stupor) and agreed to go round the next day, and he did.

He met his half brother and sister for the 1st time ever, cleared the air with his dad, was Best Man at his wedding and is now in regular contact and they all lived happily ever after.

The End.

Quick Edit: Before this, whenever he spoke of his dad he was actually refering to his stepdad (he lived with his mum still back then) so I thought thats who I was texting.
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 12:06, 9 replies)
I remember gleeing at this last time I read it too
As the yankees would say, "Good interception"
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 12:27, closed)
I felt like a prize cunt at the time
but it all turned out nicely.

My personal tale involves organised criminal gangs of Irish descent and police protection at funerals.
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 12:39, closed)
Nice family ties there :)
I did have some family living over in Wicklow, used to stay over there once every few months :)
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 12:47, closed)
Most of mine (the criminal side)
live in Salford. They're what would be described as 'gentlemen'. They were VERY well known but lost a lot of power when the Manchester scene took off and the younger generation started playing with guns snd shooting people.
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 12:53, closed)
I remember this...
...and for some reason was reminded about it the other day. Strange.

Lovely story though :-)
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 16:41, closed)
I too remember this ..
lovely story with a happy ending* - have a click

*don't be a dirty bugger
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 20:45, closed)
I remember this
from before.

Made me inordinately happy then, and inordinately happy now.
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 22:14, closed)
I wemember!
'twas a lovely story.
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 23:23, closed)
Good story, well worth the pea
Now if I'd have done that I can guarantee I'd have caused some kind of fucking disaster....
(, Mon 16 Nov 2009, 16:57, closed)

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