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This is a question Family Feuds

Pooster tells us that a relative was once sent to the shops to buy an onion, while the rest of the family went on a daytrip while he was gone. Meanwhile, whole sections of our extended kin still haven't got over a wedding brawl fifteen years ago – tell us about families at war.

(, Thu 12 Nov 2009, 12:24)
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The Final Straw
My family don't really have bust-ups so this is one of my more vivid memories of my younger brother and older sister fighting that is still mentioned by my brother at any given opportunity – enjoy.

My younger brother was an utter utter arse as a kid. I love him very much and he is a lot better now but when we were little I wanted to pelt him with Lego bricks until his face caved in. Because my dad worked shifts he wasn’t usually around to dish out the discipline, so it fell to my mother. But with three kids, a german shepherd and a fulltime job dealing with other peoples bastard children all day, she sort of had her hands full so my older sister also took it upon herself to ‘deal with my brother’.

One particular week over the summer holidays my brother had taken it upon himself to behave like an absolute arseface; the neighbours had been around to complain, he’d stolen sweets from me on three separate occasions, he had hidden all the cartridges for the beloved Sega Master System, he’d broken one of my mums ornaments and had walked mud through the house… he was being a dick and my mother decided that a suitable punishment would be to ground him. Great, so then he was stuck in the house, in a terrible mood, annoying me and my sister all day. Why didn’t you just leave the house? I hear you cry! Well I could have gone out but then that would have given him access to my bedroom and he had a habit of stealing things so in the house I stayed.

That night at dinner my mum had popped around the corner to my grandparents house and my brother kicked off again and started throwing rice around the dinner table. I could see the red mist descend over my sisters face… my brother – didn’t. 'Right' she shouted and jumped up from the table and stormed off up stairs. My brother looked at me, giggled nervously and followed her. We both crept to the bottom of the stairs and nearly got knocked over as my sister stomped back down with my brothers backpack in one hand and a pillowcase in the other, ‘I’ve had enough’ she screamed, ‘you’re leaving’ and she proceeded to march into the kitchen and start filling his backpack with random food from the cupboards which included a packet of crackers and an apple. She then shoved the bag at him, handed him his Iron Eagle video, opened the front door, and pushed him outside ‘you don’t live here anymore’ she cried and slammed the door in his bemused face.

My mother returned home 5 minutes later to find my brother sitting on the driveway with a pillowcase on his head shoving crackers into his face... suffice to say he stayed clear of my sister for the rest of the summer holidays.
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 16:03, 4 replies)
Ha ha the copy of Iron Eagle,
was a nice touch :D
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 16:47, closed)
He bloody loved that damn film!
I think she also packed a remote control car in the bag too... just in case. :)
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 16:53, closed)
Genius, I wish I'd had your sister's cunning when I was younger.
(, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 20:41, closed)
Me too
(, Mon 16 Nov 2009, 17:22, closed)

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