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This is a question Family Feuds

Pooster tells us that a relative was once sent to the shops to buy an onion, while the rest of the family went on a daytrip while he was gone. Meanwhile, whole sections of our extended kin still haven't got over a wedding brawl fifteen years ago – tell us about families at war.

(, Thu 12 Nov 2009, 12:24)
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My father has been married three times.
His second wife, a lawyer from a very wealthy Chelsea family who claims to be a devout Christian, gained entrance to my father's house by deception whilst he was away and burgled him. And I don't mean ran off with the DVD player - a wholesale, removal van job, taking everything including his bed, all the furniture and bottles of fine wine given to him by my siblings and me - and she is a teetotaller.

So we're not overly enamoured of her, it has to be said.

Incredibly, she always sends me a card and a small gift at Christmas.
(, Mon 16 Nov 2009, 10:20, 5 replies)
It's odd
how sometimes one member of the couple seems to believe that anything that belongs to their spouse now belongs to THEM, and when divorce day comes they assume that - like you said for example the wine - they get everything. This may happen BEFORE the divorce of course, when they've decided they're leaving, but it's interesting.

They genuinely believe they are entitled to someone else's private belongings. We're not talking about money here or a house, I understand that often it's necessary for there to be some sort of equality, but why should he or she get the other's books? The other person's dog? Makes no sense to me.
(, Mon 16 Nov 2009, 11:16, closed)
I heard a similar story form a container HGV driver
His firm was asked to do a "personal effects" job. Basically, the wagon turns up, the removals folk load the container and it's taken to the port and shipped to wherever the customer is emigrating.

This one was a bit different. For a start, the wagon couldn't be onsite until 0900 (usual start is sun up). It had to be gone by 1700 at the latest. The house was completely stripped, lights, electrical fittings, switches, the lot. To finish off, the crew nailed up every door and window using double point nails and then superglued the locks. Did I mention all the toilets, baths, showers and sinks were smashed with a hammer?

Moral: don't make movies on your mobile of you getting a blow job from your secretary. And REALLY don't let your wife find out.

The container went to Costa Rica.
(, Mon 16 Nov 2009, 17:56, closed)
Fuck me
That's some 'next level' shit right there.
(, Mon 16 Nov 2009, 17:59, closed)
When recieving a gift from someone I dislike....
...I find returning it with a jar of vaseline mostly gives the correct message.
(, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 17:17, closed)
Bloke I know had a similar experience
He walked out of his office one afternoon to find his recently legally parted ex-wife had stolen his car. A friend tipped him off that it was at her mother's house, so he went round and told them if it happened again he would press charges. He never saw or heard from them again.
(, Thu 19 Nov 2009, 12:12, closed)

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