My letter to Chris Barrie
Dear Mr Barrie,

Firstly I would like to say what a huge fan I am, being 23 I watched Red Dwarf whilst quite young (and possibly when my parents weren't looking!). I've been influenced by the humour massively, and love the show, I can honestly say I had tears in my eyes when Rimmer left.
I'm not one to do this sort of thing but I was wondering if I could get a signed autograph?
Being a boy with no arms has been hard, I am, in fact, typing this with my nose and a cleverly constructed stick attached to my forehead made from drinking straws that I found behind the bins where I live. Who could have known such a find would be so useful? The straws even helped me to kill the mice I caught for dinner by using them and some gravel like a jungle blowpipe.
I know you are a very busy man but this one little favour would mean the world to me, with a signed autograph of yourself I could finally take down the Craig Charles one I currently have pinned to my cardboard wall and use it for a pillow, a plate, maybe even a shoe for my one foot.
With your face to encourage me I think I may be able to fight through the infection currently eating away at my eyesight, I just know I could do it.
I'd like to thank you for being such an inspiring character in my life, I feel that when I watch Red Dwarf through the window at the local Dixons even for a few moments before the security send me hopping, my life has meaning.
If you could do this it would be wonderful, I have one friend in the world who would gladly pass the photo on (if you find it in your heart to send one) and funnily enough he is called Sauronwibble, which is my name too!

His details:

Sauronwibble

Thanks again, I'd better go now the lady from PC world has called security and I'd better scarper.

The response:

10-10 for effort.

Chris will really only sign stuff at his appearances as he feels it is more
meaningful that way...
Chances are very slim... but I will forward this on....

Ben (Site Admin)

pissflaps
( SauronWibble I'll hold it, you lick it..., Fri 17 Apr 2009, 13:11, 1 reply)

I agree
a great effort. I take it he didn't respond?
( chart cat has an itch, Tue 21 Apr 2009, 9:56, closed)