* PFFT *I've been pretty farty all week, but 2 large helpings of sausage and lentil stew last night have really tipped things over the edge. I swear you can see these ones.
I'm here at work trying to hold them in so I (a) don't have to keep nipping to the loo like a madman and (b) don't gas half the office, but it's becoming increasingly difficult. I might rupture something if I'm not careful.
Tell us all about your own fartiness.
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chthonic, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 14:01)
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Train FartA few years back me and my mates decided to go and see Greenday in Manchester, and since nobody could be arsed driving we decided to get the train.
All was well until just near the end of the journey when, with out much provocation,I did a trump. This fart felt somehow different to normal farts though. Its source felt deeper than just my colon, and I felt a strange churning in my gut as the gaseous expulsion took on a sustained power that suprised me. I felt as though I could give it some real force without any fear of shitting myself, and so I did what any b3tard would do and really went with it. It was the longest, and loudest fart I've ever produced, and to make things even better it stunk AND it spread, quickly without losing its potency. This thing was so meaty that as it reached people, they started to chew before realising what it was. It was so bad that people at the other end of the carriage were asking who'd shat themselves, and one woman sat near us (who in my defence was already feeling travel sick) churned her guts out into a shopping bag.
It was the worst journey ever as far everyone else was concerned, but theres nothing quite like the smell of your own brew, and nothing quite as funny as seeing someone be sick because of it. I've never been hated by so many people so quickly though.
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Furness, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 19:55,
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