* PFFT *I've been pretty farty all week, but 2 large helpings of sausage and lentil stew last night have really tipped things over the edge. I swear you can see these ones.
I'm here at work trying to hold them in so I (a) don't have to keep nipping to the loo like a madman and (b) don't gas half the office, but it's becoming increasingly difficult. I might rupture something if I'm not careful.
Tell us all about your own fartiness.
(
chthonic, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 14:01)
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Lies!Upon meeting my current girlfriend for the first few times, and indeed for the first few months of our relationship, I was determined not to spoil things by breaking wind. She still says that the first time I farted in front of her is the most defining moment of our relationship so far.... but it is not me that the current stories revolve around.
So far there have been 2 incidents. Firstly, upon climbing into bed with her one night, I was relaxed and sleepy. Until, that is, I lifted the corner of the duvet and unleashed a stench to rival Satan's burps. I waited for the giggle signifying she was awake, but it was not forthcoming. Apparently, my girlfriend had 'dutch-ovened' me while she was asleep. I was not sure whether to be proud of her or vomit due to the stench.
The other story is not as exciting but would be rated 18. Simply put, she did not fanny fart during a climatic moment but truly arse farted. Really can kill a moment that, not helped by the fact that I nearly wet myself laughing.
No apologies for length I am afraid, the longer the funnier.
(, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 21:46, Reply)
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