* PFFT *I've been pretty farty all week, but 2 large helpings of sausage and lentil stew last night have really tipped things over the edge. I swear you can see these ones.
I'm here at work trying to hold them in so I (a) don't have to keep nipping to the loo like a madman and (b) don't gas half the office, but it's becoming increasingly difficult. I might rupture something if I'm not careful.
Tell us all about your own fartiness.
(
chthonic, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 14:01)
« Go Back
Cleared an entire discoNot me of course, but a mate of mine managed exactly that.
4 of us "on tour", 3 days of nothing but curry and lager meant that all manner of vileness was emanating from him. So on the final Sunday night in a disco in Birmingham somewhere, the place is packed, 4 of us are all dancing away, when suddenly a space opens up in the centre of the dance floor. It expanded faster and faster, peopel falling over themselves to get the hell out of th eplace, until the DJ over the tannoy system yelled for everyone to clear out, and would the fucker, currently standing in the middle all on his own, shoulders shaking uncontrollably with laughter, face screwed up like a squinty Chinese person, kindly report to security.
Seeing as he was so pissed, he failed to acknowledge the instructions and the (reluctant) security guards heaved him out of the place. Took a good 15 minutes for the air to return to survivorable levels.
The looks of unamused disgust will stay with me for quite some time, as will the drunken, indifferent amusement of my pal.
Not sure the party was ever the same that night at least.
Ahh sweet memories.
Also, as a student, me and my mates made a fart tape. Every time anyone had one to go, we recorded it on a tape. Try playing back 35 minutes of non stop farts with accompanying laughs, groans and comments without laughing and you are more of a man than I.
(, Tue 17 Jul 2007, 8:54, Reply)
« Go Back