* PFFT *I've been pretty farty all week, but 2 large helpings of sausage and lentil stew last night have really tipped things over the edge. I swear you can see these ones.
I'm here at work trying to hold them in so I (a) don't have to keep nipping to the loo like a madman and (b) don't gas half the office, but it's becoming increasingly difficult. I might rupture something if I'm not careful.
Tell us all about your own fartiness.
(
chthonic, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 14:01)
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Konichi*parp*Back in my London days (the hour of this posting should demonstrate an Antipodean address, or a Japanese work ethic, you work it out) I was on the tube, minding my own business and not making eye contact, as is dictated by the unwritten (ok, in some places written) laws of commuting in London.
Anyway, somewhere along the way an ancient Japanese man, (like the kind you see in kung fu movies with long white beards and warts, except this one was wearing a shiny tracksuit) embarked.
As the doors closed a strange sound made one or two people raise their lowered eyes. A second sounds caused a few more people to look around wondering what was going on. A third distinctly fart sounding noise had half of the carriage searching for the culprit. A fourth sound was obviously emanating from the little Japanese fella, as he was the only one not looking around trying to find the source.
And with the fifth and final 'toot', the doors opened and he trotted off.
Being a generally happy and positive person, I was looking forward to the feeling of mirth and camaraderie that would ensue once he disembarked and had my "oh these silly people!" and "only on the Tube!" facial expressions ready. But no. This was London. Everyone went furiously and determinedly back to their papers, books and ipods. More ashamed of themselves for risking making eye contact than that little Japanese fella will ever be for his sneaky arse trumpeting. Londoners should envy him his lack of shame. But maybe not emulate it...
(, Thu 19 Jul 2007, 7:56, Reply)
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