La Tomatina
Don't, for the love of God, go to this festival.

The worlds largest food fight...La Tomatina is held in a tiny village called Bunol near Valencia. They defrost thousands and thousands of spanish tomatoes and pour them into the streets of the village using large trucks that barely fit down the narrow roads.

Being young and baulchy, I threw myself into it with youthful vigour. My excitement soon turned to horror as I crammed my way into the body filled streets.

First of all. The locals take pleasure in pouring buckets of water from their balconies onto the unsuspecting masses. Some even have hoses! The first time its quite refreshing (in 40 degree heat) the 20th time, it can get annoying!

Secondly, there are hoardes of burly spanish men who take it upon themselves to rip the shirts of the backs of unsuspecting tourists...male or female. Did I mention, the shirts are wet too. Have you ever had a wet shirt ripped off your back? It fucking hurts!

Then as the truck approaches, you have are forced onto the pavement with thousands of people and as it passes you become knee high in tomato juice and commence throwing. The texture is like stepping into the kebab you ate last night AFTER you have ejected it from you system and added rotting tomato sauce. The smell is similarly unbearable. The activity is dangerous and frantic. Also, some of the tomatoes are not properly defrosted and these particular tomatoes can cause serious injury.

Now half naked, bruised and covered in tomato juice you make your way out of the village only to discover that you have lost a shoe and the other is now unwearable.
Whats more; as the 40 degree sun rays burn tomato juice into your skin you realise that if you added a bit of mozarella, you would infact be a pizza. Only its a sweaty, out of date pizza.

Having said all this I loved it as it really was a once in a life-time experience.
(Eggstrovert isnt patronising you...honest..., Thu 4 Jun 2009, 16:05, Reply)