Reposting. Because pearoasting is for cunts.
I may have mentioned before that I do occassional security work.
This is generally quite tedious, until summer arrives, at which point in time it becomes a series of weekends away at music festivals up and down the UK. At one of the larger UK festival a call comes over the radio from a fairly bemused response team.
The victim had a lobe extension, what this effectively is, is a ear piercing that has been stretched and a hoop inserted to give a clear opening. Sometimes these are a few millimetres at most, sometimes they're wide enough to fit a can of redbull through.
Someone completely unknown to the victim approached him and after a brief conversation, then said the following "You know what would make a cool picture? If I was to padlock you to that fencing through your ear!"
The victim agreed that it indeed would make a cool picture. The protagonist produced a padlock from his pocket, they approached the nearest fencing and he was duly locked to it through the lovingly stretched hole in his flesh.
The protagonist unfortunately didn't stick around to take a picture. He didn't even release the poor sod. Instead, he just fucked off and left him.
( Muns, Fri 26 Jun 2015, 8:50, 2 replies)

You do festival security? Why have you never mentioned this before??

(yo man river INVINCIBLE, Fri 26 Jun 2015, 9:54, closed)

I suppose that's the pitfall of copying and pasting from a time when I didn't mention it all that often
to a time when I discuss it openly.
( Muns, Fri 26 Jun 2015, 10:01, closed)