Amy....sigh....Amy
My first love was a girl named Amy. We were in 4th grade. One night I had a dream that one of her parents and one of my parents both got killed and our remaining parents got married. Not much of a dream, but I went to school the next day, and "wooomp!" there she was, in all her cuteness, right down to her oversize knit mittens.

Being my first love, I didn't want to screw it up (truth, I was scared to death!). So I kept quiet and tried to learn everything I could about her without her knowing, that way I could dazzle her at the right time and she'd be mine forever. I'd lie awake at night and the ticking of my clock meted out her name: a-me a-me a-me. I had the perfect plan. I'd ride my bike past her house until she saw me. At first I'd play all distant, like I didn't see her, then I'd start up a distracted conversation and her heart would melt for me. Then she'd chase me and we'd be together forever.

So I looked in the phone book, and there were only a couple houses with her last name that I figured she could have lived in. One was a person named Delose who lived on "Pleasant View Rd." Pleasant View, I'm sure. Rode past all summer, no luck. All fall, no luck. I did see her once while I was riding, though (not at the house - more on that later). It was right after school and she jumped out in the road and waved her arms at me. I kept riding. So much for my great plans (for those who don't already know, don't play distant. Life's too short. You blow it once you blow it forever, and life's too long to carry regrets!).

I thought my chances were great on the last day of fifth grade when my friend Joe chased her with a snake and I got to play the good guy. "C'mon, leave her alone!" However, I never saw her again, and still have never said a word directly to her. She moved at the end of fifth grade (snake trauma related?), but I was to carry on the crush for another year.

Actually, I did see her once more (here's the first punchline of the story). I was riding my bike after the end of eighth grade to see my new girlfriend (the first real one, meaning first foolin' 'round). I saw a girl walking across a parking lot with Amy's last name on the back of her pullover. She looked at me and it was her. God giving me one more chance? God teasing me? I'll never know. You can bet on lonely nights through my teens and 20s I wondered if I ruined my life at the tender age of 10. That was truly the last time I saw her.

The second, and funnier, punchline: Remember Delose? The house on Pleasant View? Saw an obit in the paper later. He had died at age 86. Yep, I spent the summer of 1982 stalking a geriatric WWI vet!
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Thu 20 Oct 2005, 21:15, Reply)