Don't ask me why...
Some years ago now, I was idling around at work. The floor manager was absent and we were waiting for a relief manager to come and take the reins for the next couple of days. We were discussing who might turn up when Aphrodite herself walked in. She was achingly beautiful, never before had I seen such splendour in human form. She spent most of the day locked away in the little office, but I couldn't shake her from my mind, her image was burned into my eyes. I couldn't sleep that night, I was so obssesed. While she was with us I was a model employee, hoping, praying that it would catch her attention. On the last day she was working with us, the Gods smiled down on me and gave me a chance to interact with their carefully crafted creation. It was lunch and I sat at the table with her. She smiled radiantly and said "Hi!", and I stumbled a greeting of my own. She could see I was nervous and giggled a little. I gathered my wits to strike a conversation and began with, "So... what are you, like, 15?".

Just to add some context for you, she was in her mid to late twenties. She stopped eating, looking at me dumstruck, holding a sandwich in her mouth. She was clearly thinking "What the fuck?" I was thinking "What the fuck?" What, was I trying to compliment her? I have no fucking idea why I said it, or where it came from. After about 30 of the most painful seconds of my life, I excused myself to the bathroom and didn't leave for two hours. Even thinking about it now makes me want to be struck by lightning.
(God_of_the_mind, Sat 20 Feb 2010, 17:30, Reply)